My comment in the first paragraph I said “Re word this sentence more clearly.” Code for Local feedback
In the second paragraph I said, “Great quote and awesome job expanding on that quote.” Code for Evidence feedback
In the first paragraph I said, “I really like this sentence. Well said!” I left another comment and said “Good job addressing both Armstrong and Schiller in your first paragraph. These comments are both code for Code for Evidence feedback.
On the second page I said, “Very true. I really like this paragraph. You did a good job explaining how society only feels one side and they confuse it with the true beauty.” This is code for Ideas.
On the second page and second paragraph I said, “Adding your opinion is great. I feel like you can expand more on what your thoughts are on beauty. Give some examples and pictures to show the reader what you consider to be beautiful.” This is code for organization and code for evidence.
On the second page and third paragraph I said, “Add a quote from Schiller in this paragraph.” This is code for evidence.
On the last page I said, “Great closing statement.” This is code for ideas.
On the last page I said, “You have a lot of great ideas and you wrote this essay very clearly and well thought out. Once you expand more by talking about a classmates “Let’s Talk About Art” project and adding pictures/hyperlinks it will all come together. To expand on you essay add more about your own opinions and what you consider to be beautiful and more quotes.” This is code for Ideas and also code for Evidence.
FRAMING STATEMENT:
My comment in the first paragraph I said “Re word this sentence more clearly.” This is code for local feedback because I am saying to fix the sentence structure and paper formatting.
In the second paragraph I said, “Great quote and awesome job expanding on that quote.” This is code for Evidence feedback because they used good quotes and examples.
In the first paragraph I said, “I really like this sentence. Well said!” I left another comment and said “Good job addressing both Armstrong and Schiller in your first paragraph. These comments are both code for Code for Evidence feedback because they used great explanation evidence and addressed both the authors.
On the second page I said, “Very true. I really like this paragraph. You did a good job explaining how society only feels one side and they confuse it with the true beauty.” This is code for ideas because it’s relationships between the peer’s ideas.
On the second page and second paragraph I said, “Adding your opinion is great. I feel like you can expand more on what your thoughts are on beauty. Give some examples and pictures to show the reader what you consider to be beautiful.” This is code for organization because I’m saying he needs to add more of his opinions. This is also code for evidence because I said to add more pictures and examples.
On the second page and third paragraph I said, “Add a quote from Schiller in this paragraph.” This is code for evidence because it needs more quotes.
On the last page I said, “Great closing statement.” This is code for ideas because the writer explained his main argument and thesis in his closing paragraph.
On the last page I said, “You have a lot of great ideas and you wrote this essay very clearly and well thought out. Once you expand more by talking about a classmates “Let’s Talk About Art” project and adding pictures/hyperlinks it will all come together. To expand on you essay add more about your own opinions and what you consider to be beautiful and more quotes.” This is code for ideas because I’m giving advice to add more picture and hyperlinks and relationship between the peers ideas. This is also code for evidence because I said add more quotes for evidence.
